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How Long Does the Divorce Mediation Process Take?

Collaborative Process /

The length of time needed to complete your divorce mediation process may vary considerably depending on the complexity of the proceedings. Understanding the factors that can affect the duration of your mediation can help you manage your expectations and help you deal with the negotiation process more easily. Here are some of the primary factors that could affect the length of time needed to complete your divorce. Do You Have Children? When children are involved, it can significantly complicate divorce cases even for situations handled by a mediation attorney. If you have children, a number of issues may arise during your divorce proceedings, including the following: Child custody and visitation rights Parenting plans, including living arrangements Child support Religious, medical and educational matters If you and your former partner can agree on these matters quickly, it can help speed up your divorce proceedings. In most cases, however, the courts will look at these arrangements carefully to make sure they are in the best interests of your children and are workable for you and your former spouse. Do You Have Substantial Debts or Assets? Dividing your debts and assets can be more difficult and time-consuming if you are significantly in debt or have many assets to account for during the divorce mediation process. In some cases, it may be easy for you and your former partner to agree on an appropriate way to divide your financial assets and liabilities. If you are unable to reach a reasonable agreement on your own, it may take longer to resolve the economic aspects of your marriage and finalize your divorce. Can You Compromise? A willingness to negotiate is an essential element for successful mediation. This is especially true for divorce proceedings. If you and your former partner can put your personal feelings aside to find common ground and make decisions that are beneficial for both you and your children, you can often shorten the time needed to complete your divorce proceedings. This can help reduce the cost of your divorce and help you achieve the most practical solutions for everyone involved. If you and your former spouse can agree on specifics, you may be able to streamline the divorce process to a significant degree. Do You Still Have Conflict With Your Former Partner? If you have hurt feelings or anger towards your partner, it may be difficult to come to an agreement during the mediation process. Setting aside your emotions and working to resolve problems that arise during divorce mediation can help ensure the process goes as smoothly as possible. In most cases, the speed of mediated divorce proceedings is dependent on the ability of both partners to agree on the issues involved. It is important to remember that by working with a divorce mediator, you can increase your chance of a faster resolution, but only if you are willing to compromise.

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Five Ways to Reduce Stress Levels During the Divorce Process

Divorce Advice /

Divorce can be painful and emotionally draining even when the proceedings are amicable. Finding ways to deal with the stress associated with the California divorce process can provide you with added emotional resources to draw on during this difficult time. Here are five tested strategies to help you navigate divorce in a healthy and stress free way. Get Some Exercise Exercising and staying fit can help you drain off some nervous energy and build strength. This added physical activity can also help to balance your hormonal levels to deal with the stress of your divorce and all the associated activities and responsibilities. By taking time out for fitness and health, you can even boost your immune system to reduce the risk of colds and other illnesses that could slow you down during this critical time of your life.   Catch Up on Sleep   Just as exercise helps you build strength and endurance, sleep is necessary to rest your mind and to provide you with greater emotional stability. According to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, adults require seven or more hours of sleep every night to enjoy the best possible health. More than one-third of adults report sleeping less than the recommended amount on a regular basis. By making sure that you get plenty of sleep, you can increase your ability to take on new challenges and to deal with the California divorce process more effectively every day.   Talk to a Friend Setting aside some time to share your emotional journey with your friends can ensure that you maintain valuable perspective on your situation. By seeking support from loyal and trusted family members and friends, you can feel less alone during your divorce proceedings. Lunches, get-togethers and movie nights can be good ways to boost your spirits and to help you maintain the most positive attitude on your current situation and your future prospects. Keep a Journal Writing down your thoughts, feelings and experiences during the California divorce process can also help you achieve a more positive perspective on these events and activities. By keeping a comprehensive written record, you may also be able to look back on these events and to share them with others who may be in a similar situation in the future.   Consider Collaborative Divorce If you and your former partner are still on reasonably amicable terms, a collaborative divorce arrangement might be the right solution for you. By working together to come to mutually beneficial agreements, you and your former spouse can often reduce the stress associated with divorce and can enjoy the greatest possible flexibility when dealing with issues related to child custody, division of assets and debts and living arrangements after the divorce is final. This can help each of you to move on in a more positive and practical way. Collaborative divorce is not for everyone. It is not recommended, for example, in cases where physical or emotional abuses have taken place. If you and your partner are on reasonably good terms and can discuss issues safely and rationally, you may be good candidates for this style of divorce in California.

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When Divorce May Be Your Best Option

Collaborative Divorce /

Deciding to go ahead with divorce proceedings can evoke complex emotions. In some cases, however, divorce is the best possible solution for one or both parties. Here are some situations in which experts agree that divorce is usually the most appropriate and safest response for those involved. Physical Abuse If your spouse or partner has abused you or your children, removing yourself from the relationship can prevent further incidents that could cause serious injuries or even death. It is essential to take your children and yourself out of this unhealthy environment. Failing to act could leave you open to even more severe abuse. Organizations are available to provide protection for children and spouses who have suffered physical abuse at the hands of their partners. If looking for a local center in Fresno, California, reach out to the Marjaree Mason Center by calling their 24-Hour Crisis Hotline at (559) 233-HELP. It is important to remember that taking steps to stop the cycle of abuse now can lead to a happier future for you and those you love. Emotional Abuse Emotional abuse may be harder to identify. If your partner routinely makes comments intended to belittle or degrade you or your children, removing yourself and your children from that environment can help you maintain healthy self-esteem and can instill a sense of self-worth that can lead to a happier life in the future. If your children are often targeted for these abusive comments or attitudes, taking them out of this toxic environment and raising them in a more positive space can often help them to become healthy and well-balanced adults in the future. Repeated Infidelity While one isolated mistake may not be enough to break up a marriage, repeated incidents of infidelity can cause serious rifts between couples that could lead to hostility and unhappiness. This can create an unhealthy environment in which to raise children and a source of friction between the two parties involved. If you feel that your partner’s infidelity is unacceptable, filing for divorce can mark the beginning of a new start for both of you. Abuse of Drugs and Alcohol Drug and alcohol abuse can transform the person you married into a stranger. An occasional drink is not generally cause for concern. If your partner is drunk or under the influence of drugs on a regular basis and is unwilling to discuss or cut back on the use of these substances, a divorce may be the best answer for you. This is especially true if you have minor children or if your partner is involved in illegal activities because of his or her addiction or alcoholism. By separating yourself from these activities and the criminal element that may be associated with them, you can protect your own parental rights and avoid the risk involved in your partner’s actions.   If you find yourself in any of the situations listed above and are considering filing for divorce in California, contact the Law Office of Julia Ann Brungess for legal help.

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How to Prepare for Divorce Mediation

Mediation /

Divorce can be a challenging and emotional time for you and your former spouse. Finding a divorce mediator you can trust is a good first step toward reducing stress and ensuring the most positive outcomes for your case. Here are some key steps to help you prepare for divorce mediation in the state of California. Commit to the Process Divorce mediation requires the willing participation of both parties to the divorce. Discussing this option with your former partner can help you determine whether these arrangements make sense in your case. In general, divorce mediation works best for couples who are on relatively good terms with each other and who are willing to hear the other party’s voice so that both parties can achieve their goals during this process. Collect Financial Records An important part of the mediation process is compiling a comprehensive list of debts, assets and incomes to determine the most equitable way to divide these elements of your current property. By providing a full and honest accounting of the financial equation, you can build a rapport and create trust that can help you navigate the entire mediation process more effectively. Be Prepared to Listen During the divorce mediation process, you will be asked to identify the most important issues to be addressed during these proceedings. Being willing to hear the other person’s concerns and acknowledge the value and importance of those concerns is the key to ensuring that your mediation goes smoothly and that you achieve your most important goals in your divorce. Consider the Welfare of Your Children One aspect of divorce mediation California couples cite as most beneficial is the ability to put the interests of your children first. By working together, you and your former spouse can come to enduring agreements on a number of different issues: Where your children will live Parenting plans Medical care and insurance arrangements Educational options Religious or spiritual upbringing Child support Who will claim your children as dependents If you opt for mediation over court proceedings for your divorce, you may be able to make adjustments to these arrangements without returning to the court to submit your request. This can streamline any changes and can help you maintain more control over the process during and after your divorce. Choose an Experienced Mediator Working with an experienced and qualified mediator can make a major difference in the quality of the results you achieve and the speed of the process. Your mediator should be responsive to your concerns and should have the right qualifications to perform these duties. Making sure that your mediator has the experience and expertise needed to handle your case can be critical to the success of your mediation process. Divorce mediation can be less expensive and more convenient than comparable court proceedings. By preparing effectively to work together with your former partner and to achieve mutually beneficial outcomes, you and your former spouse may be able to reduce the stress typically associated with the traditional divorce process.

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How to Resolve Your California Divorce Outside of Court

Collaborative Divorce /

If you are currently considering divorce proceedings, opting for alternative dispute resolutions may provide significant benefits for you and your former partner. Choosing to work together to reach a resolution of the issues involved in your California divorce can reduce stress on all parties. How Mediation Can Help For those willing to set aside their grievances and work together to reach mutually beneficial solutions, divorce mediation services can assist in addressing issues in your separation and divorce, including the following: Child support Child custody, including living arrangements, health care, educational options and religious upbringingDivision of assets and debts Sale of shared property Spousal support By discussing these issues with an impartial mediator, you and your former partner can often come to workable agreements without hashing these problems out in court. This could potentially save you money and time in finalizing your divorce proceedings and getting on with your lives under your joint terms.   Collaborative Divorce Without Court Collaborative divorce proceedings also provide support for couples in the state of California. This process begins when each partner hires a collaborative attorney who then advises that party in connection with his or her concerns and interests. By providing a safe environment in which to share information, you and your spouse are given every opportunity to find workable solutions for your family. By opting for collaborative divorce without court, you can often enjoy the most amicable resolution for your separation and divorce proceedings while avoiding the tremendous emotional and financial cost of litigation.     The Advantages of Settling Divorce Out of Court Resolving your divorce amicably through mediation or collaborative divorce proceedings can provide significant benefits for you and your family. Some of the most important advantages of these processes include the following: Collaborative or mediated divorce proceedings can reduce stress for you and your former spouse and lead to an amicable relationship after the proceedings are complete. Your children do not experience the animosity and anger that can be exacerbated in litigated divorce. Instead, their lives are not disrupted and they can maintain a healthier attitude toward both parents. Opting for mediation or collaborative arrangements can often reduce the time needed to resolve your issues and finalize your divorce. The overall cost of collaborative divorce or mediated proceedings can be less than the cost of fighting it out in court. Arrangements that are agreed upon in mediation or collaboration can usually be altered to suit changing needs without applying to the court. This can make a big difference in the amount of paperwork and inconvenience involved in making changes to the provisions of your divorce. By opting for divorce without court, you and your former spouse can enjoy these benefits and can finalize your California divorce in the most practical and stress-free way possible. If looking for legal assistance with your divorce proceeding in or around Fresno, California, contact us at Kezirian Law, P.C. It is our vision to promote, preserve or restore healthy family relationships during challenging legal transitions.

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How to Help Children Cope With Divorce

Divorce Advice /

The divorce process can be stressful and challenging even for adults. For children, the uncertainty and worry involved in these proceedings can be even worse. Finding ways to help your children positively deal with their feelings can help them cope with this process more easily. Here are some proven ways to help your children adjust to life during and after your divorce. Keep Hostility and Negativity Away From the Children If you and your former spouse are still at odds during and after your divorce, do your best to keep your anger and conflict away from your children. Try to stay positive in both your attitude and your comments about the other parent. This can provide children with a much-needed sense of calm and balance during your divorce proceedings. Be as Honest as Possible Sharing every detail of your relationship or your divorce with your children is not recommended. Letting them know in general terms why you and your partner are divorcing and explaining the general plan for living arrangements, visitation and custody can often help to put your children at ease during this difficult time. By practicing honesty and openness, you can ensure that your children feel included and loved during the process of divorce. Strive for Normalcy If you can manage it, allowing your children to continue to live in the same home and to attend the same schools can provide them with an added sense of security while your divorce proceedings are being finalized. If you must move for financial reasons, explain the situation honestly. Older children may even be given a voice regarding the new living arrangements to help them feel more in control of the situation. Be Ready for Questions Your children are likely to have many questions about their future living arrangements, schooling and the relationship they will have with each of their parents. Think about the answers to these questions before sitting down to have the big talk. This can allow you to appear more confident and positive throughout your discussions with your children. In many cases, your kids will look to you to determine how to react. Staying calm and answering their questions honestly can go a long way toward ensuring that your children maintain their trust in you during your divorce. Practice Flexibility Adjusting to your divorce can be stressful for both you and your partner. Try to accommodate changes in visitation pick-up and drop-off times whenever possible. This can help your partner manage these responsibilities during the critical transitional period during and just after your divorce. Additionally, by showing empathy and flexibility to your former spouse, you can often create a better rapport that can help you work together as parents more effectively in the future.   These tips on how to help children cope with divorce can provide you with added confidence when dealing with the emotional aspects of this process. By taking your child’s unique personality into account and tailoring your approach to their needs, you can navigate the divorce process more effectively on their behalf.

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Making Joint Custody Work After a Divorce

Child Custody /

In the state of California, joint legal custody is defined as shared responsibility for the welfare of children and the decisions made on their behalf after a divorce. Physical custody may be shared equally in these arrangements or may be managed by one parent with visitation for the other parent. If you are considering joint custody in California, here are six helpful tips for making it work for you and your family.   Put the Kids First It may be tempting to rehash arguments and bring up issues involved in your divorce with your former partner. Avoiding these points of contention and focusing on the needs of your children can allow you to build a more amicable relationship. This can allow you to work together more easily and come to necessary compromises when deciding on matters related to education, religion, health care and other elements of your child’s life.   Leave Some Room for Flexibility Creating ironclad rules about visitation, pick-up times and vacations can lead to trouble when issues arise that require changes to these arrangements. By allowing some wiggle room and permitting some alterations to schedules, you can ensure that your children enjoy time with both parents while building a cordial relationship with your former spouse.       Work on Your Communication Skills Finding the most practical and convenient ways to contact your former partner regarding school issues, scheduling and other matters related to your children can help you manage your time more effectively. Email, texting and shared calendars are among the most common and easy-to-use technologies. By incorporating these communication tools into your daily routines, you can touch base with your former spouse and your children regarding any changes to your schedule or upcoming events.   Present a United Front Even if you are still at odds with your former partner, making sure you are on the same page regarding extracurricular activities, discipline and educational options can allow you to support each other when discussing these matters with your children. This approach can help you to avoid situations in which your child may attempt to play one parent against the other to achieve his or her goals.     Accept Input from Your Children In many cases, your children may have their own ideas and requests about the custody arrangements made on their behalf. Incorporating their suggestions into your arrangement for joint custody in California can often allow things to go more smoothly for everyone involved and can help your children to feel heard and understood during this transitional period.   Move on From Mistakes As parents, both you and your former partner will sometimes make mistakes. Taking steps to fix these errors without assigning blame can help you maintain a working relationship with the other parent in the equation. By being tolerant and forgiving of the mistakes of others, you can also set an excellent example for your children in the right way to treat others even after a romantic relationship has ended.   These six strategies can allow you to build a solid foundation for your children and to manage the legal and emotional complexities of joint custody in California.

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How to Raise a Healthy Child After a Divorce

Child Custody /

Making sure that your child is emotionally healthy during and after your divorce can give them the best possible start later in life. While some stress may be natural during the divorce process, you can take some steps to lessen the impact on your child. Here are some helpful hints to ease the transition and to provide support when dealing with children and divorce. Be Honest While not every detail of your divorce should be shared with your children, being as open and honest as possible can help your children feel more confident about the process. By keeping your children in the loop about the progress of your divorce and future plans, you can provide them with added confidence and security during this difficult process.       Avoid Negativity Maintaining a positive attitude can sometimes be difficult for divorcing parents, but it is important to overcome issues for the greater good of both you and your children. Making an effort to stay focused on happier subjects can produce a more peaceful environment at home. It is important to remember that your cheerful attitude can rub off on your children and can help them look forward to the future with a more optimistic perspective.     Minimize Disruptions After your divorce, you may need to change your living arrangements. If possible, try and delay these big changes until after the end of the school year. Finding a way to help your child maintain normalcy during and after your divorce can pay off in improved academic performance and increased comfort levels for your children.   Make Time to Play Setting aside some time for family fun can help children maintain a sunny outlook even during a difficult divorce. Kids need something to look forward to and a chance to expend some of their abundant energy in active play. By making sure that your children enjoy opportunities to express themselves creatively in a relaxed and enjoyable environment, you can reduce the stress associated with children and divorce.     Share Parenting Duties It may not always be possible to share parenting responsibilities with your former spouse, especially if abuse or drug use were factors in your divorce. If you and your former partner have remained on relatively good terms, you should share in the everyday duties of parenting to reduce the pressure on both of you.         Be Prepared for Tears Even the most amicable divorces can be hard for children to accept and understand. Taking tears and tantrums in stride can allow younger children to feel more confident that they are still loved. Older children may have a lot of questions about the future. By listening to them and responding as completely and truthfully as possible, you may be able to alleviate some of their fears about the divorce process.       Enlist Some Help Alerting school counselors and teachers to your situation can sometimes expand the safety net for children. Unless abuse or risk to your child is involved, you usually do not need to share details about your divorce proceedings with these educational professionals. Providing them with a heads-up that your child may be under additional stress is usually enough to achieve the results you need. By staying calm and positive throughout the process, you can support your children during and after your divorce. This can help your family weather this temporary storm and achieve the best possible outcomes when dealing with children and divorce.

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How to Break the News About Divorce to your School-aged Child

Divorce Advice /

  There is no one right way to deal with issues relating to divorce and children. Depending on the age of your children, the problems that led to your breakup and the current relationship between you and your former partner, you may be able to discuss the situation and defuse worries that your children may have about potential changes in their lives. Here are some of the most useful strategies for breaking the news of your divorce to your children. Keep Things Simple for Younger Children Children in elementary school may need less time for explanations and discussions and may take longer to understand the concept of divorce. Keeping your explanations practical and straightforward can often provide these children with the best explanation. It is also helpful to remind children that both parents love them and that they will be cared for during and after the divorce is final.       Set Aside Enough Time for Older Children Older children are likely to have strong reactions to the news. Allowing enough time for them to express their feelings and to ask any questions they may have can help you deal with the issues they are feeling towards the divorce.       Present a United Front If possible, invite your former spouse or partner to break the news to your children with you. By planning a joint meeting that includes all members of the family unit, you can avoid blame issues and ensure that all children hear the news about the divorce at the same time. This can help you prevent miscommunications that could cause problems down the line.     Keep Things Positive Fear of abandonment and worry about the future are two of the most prominent issues associated with children and divorce. Making a real effort to present the divorce in a positive way can help your kids feel more hopeful and optimistic about the upcoming changes in their lives.     Offer Practical Information Focusing on how the divorce will affect your children in both the short and long term can provide them with an added sense of security and confidence. Most kids will ask practical questions that may include some or all of the following:   Will I be able to attend the same school? Who will I stay with and where will I live? Will I be able to visit the other parent? Can I still go to summer camp? Will I still see both parents? Will I have two houses and two bedrooms? You may also be asked why you and your partner are splitting up and if you still love each other. Be as honest as possible when answering these questions. Keeping your focus on practical questions, however, can be more useful when addressing issues related to divorce and children. Divorce is rarely an easy process. Taking time out to break the news gently to your children can prepare them for upcoming changes and can ensure the most comfortable transition during this stressful time. By implementing these helpful hints, you can ensure that your children are as confident and optimistic as possible during and after your divorce.  

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Important Facts You Need To Know About Child Support

Child Support /

Child support payments are intended to help parents share the costs of raising their children after a divorce. Understanding the various factors that go into child support in California can provide you with added help in achieving the right arrangements for your children and your finances. Here are some facts you should know about child support in our state. No Limit on Child Support California does not impose any upper limits on the amount of child support that can be ordered. Instead, child support in California is usually calculated using a guideline that considers the following factors: Income levels for both parents Time spent with each parent Number of children Tax-deductible expenses and tax filing status Existing child support and spousal support payments made Spousal support received In some instances, the courts may deviate somewhat from the child support calculations of the guideline. This is determined on a case-by-case basis. Child support amounts for amounts less than the California guideline recommendations may be subject to increases; those at or above the recommended amount are less likely to be changed by the courts. Determining Income Gross income can be calculated by adding up all sources of monetary support from employment, commissions, benefits, gambling and lottery winnings, dividends and interest and profits from business operations. Money received as public assistance or paid out in child support or alimony, however, can usually be excluded from the calculations used to determine child support in California.         Health Care, Child Care and Tuition Certain expenses may be shared equally between parents regardless of the child support awarded by the court. These can include costs for health care, child care and tuition for educational programs. Depending on the financial resources and the court’s assessment, one or both parents may be held responsible for the costs of these necessities. Imputed Income Can Be Used to Figure Child Support If the court believes that one parent is deliberately remaining unemployed or underemployed to avoid paying child support, it may use imputed income to determine the amount of child support that parent should be paying. Imputed income is the amount that the court decides the individual could earn based on his or her educational level, job skills and employment history. This practice is intended to prevent parents from avoiding their responsibilities to provide support for their minor children. Child Support Orders Can Be Modified If one parent loses a job or if changes have been made in the amount of time spent with each parent, it may be possible to modify the court-ordered child support temporarily or on a permanent basis. This can be easier if the amount of child support ordered by the court is less than the recommended amount under California guidelines. Changes in employment, income levels, legal status and family size can be used as the basis for a request in the child support order. The current financial situations of both parents will be taken into consideration by the courts to determine whether a modification is justified and practical for all parties involved. Working with an attorney from the Law Office of Julia Ann Brungess who specializes in family law in the state of California can provide added support for parents dealing with child support issues. These dedicated legal professionals can provide the right options for your family and can help you move forward after a divorce.

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